I always find myself in the midst of decision-making, asking myself these two questions:
‘Am I making this decision based on what someone else thinks of me?’ or, ‘Am I limiting myself in any way, shape or form?’
These two mantras are more of a mental checklist I have, to make sure that I am constantly living my best life for me and not living according to anyone else.
Everyday we unconsciously live our lives and make decisions based on what others may think of us or what others tell us we can, and cannot accomplish. This is a surefire way of allowing our goals and dreams slip and in most cases, it’s often used as an excuse to not achieve something great.
What’s the craziest idea you’ve ever had? Or the best case scenario of your life you’ve ever wanted but thought you couldn’t have because people around you made it seem impossible, scary or plain down too hard?
People’s perceptions of life will always make you feel like the great things you want in life are unattainable and most times this comes from a loving, protective place. As much as there are the family and friends who want to protect us by putting us off the things we want, if you listen to these people on how to live your best life, you will end up living their limited perceptions of what a ‘good life’ is, but is actually quite mediocre.
For years I’ve been living this way until I realized this. It is the most unfulfilling and unhappy way to live, and it completely shattered my confidence for a long time. That is when I decided that my life is mines and I am rather exhausted trying to live it the way everyone thinks I should.
There’s this saying I heard once that really resonated with me, “You might be everyone’s cup of tea but someone out there still loves coffee.”
When I read this something in me clicked and gave me the words to sum up what caused me to change my mindset, and gain more confidence and self-love in the way I live my life today. Today I live my life doing the things I want to do, setting the bar as high as I possibly want in everything I know that is attainable to me, whether it has been done or not, no matter what the circumstance, situations or limitations, if I want it bad enough, I will find a way to have it.
Rule #1: Never Care About What Others Think Of You
Rule #2: Never Limit Your Creativity
It takes a lot to live according to your own terms at first and it takes even more to do it freely and without feeling insecure about it. But, starting out, that’s completely normal. To be honest, you’re always going to find moments of insecurity now and again, and that is why these two mantras are in my head in almost everything I do, throughout my days. You get to place where you actually realize that you control your thoughts and those little peaks of insecurity. That’s when you also realize it has almost nothing to do with someone else and everything to do with you.
The only person stopping you from doing the things you love is you.
Keep in mind that you contribute nothing to this world when you stop yourself from doing things that are unimaginable to others, only because you didn’t believe in yourself. Don’t rely on the opinions and experiences of others to convince you to do something incredible with the one life you have. And if you’re afraid to fail, do it. Fail better, fail forward and try again.
Alana – Mae
Yaaas gurl 👏👏👏 Rule #3: Talk less about your dreams, work more on them instead.
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